Which To Choose?
March 17, 2015
By: The Mogambo Guru
I would like to bring up a quote of Ernest Hemingway, a writer whom I greatly admire, and to whom I have often been compared as a writer, as in “You wrote this crap? You suck! And compared to Ernest Hemingway, you REALLY suck!”
In my defense to such malicious attacks, I used to reply, with my usual spluttering outrage, “Well, he was no economist, and he never said ‘We’re freaking doomed!’, which is something I wrote, and which is some of the finest writing in the whole stinking history of writing, in that it is pithy, insightful and perfectly true!”
And this does not even count the crucial fact that, if Hemingway was alive today, he would be 116 years old now, and I could easily beat him arm-wrestling to prove who is the better writer.
Well, the truth is that I was always aware that Hemingway knew about economics, as I had read where he wrote “The first panacea for a mismanaged nation is inflation of the currency; the second is war. Both bring a temporary prosperity; both bring a permanent ruin. Both are the refuge of political and economic opportunists.”
Well, the first part is certainly true, despite whole armies of laughable Keynesian blockheads infesting the Federal Reserve with the foul stench of their conceited econ-calculus babble who say (to their everlasting shame) otherwise, and whose glaring, catastrophic failure at monetary policy has resulted in final-straw, last-ditch, do-or-die desperation moves like outright monetizing (creating the money to buy) government debt, monetizing equities, monetizing housing, monetizing commodities, and even monetizing portions of people’s mortgages (HARP)! It goes on and on! Money and debt are being created everywhere!
For instance, how to explain how, there I was, browsing at John Rubino’s Dollarcollapse.com site, reading his essay with the intriguing title “Lowest Interest Rates EVER.” Of course, one naturally takes this all-caps “EVER” thing as mere attention-grabbing hyperbole, sort of like advertisers proclaiming “New!” and “Improved!” when referring to my laundry, teeth and toilet bowl, and how, with their fine products, I could finally achieve the bliss of Nirvana by getting everything whiter than white, brighter than bright, cleaner than clean.
But, as far as interest rates go, it turn out to be true! He cites a chart done by Myles Udland, of Business Insider, using data “drawn from research by the Bank of England,” showing that -- indeed! --, long-term AND short-term interest rates for the last 5,000 years at least, shows that they have NEVER been lower! Never! In all of history!
Amazing! The evil Fed has created so much cash and credit that it has driven the price of debt up (and thus the imputed interest rate down) to Never Before In History (NBIH) levels. So can inflation in consumer prices be far behind?
Well, Theburningplatform.com asks the question, “How’s that deflation working out for you?” I was hoping it would that back my theory, so that I could confidently cite it, seizing another Golden Mogambo Moment (GMM) to be snotty, imperious, sarcastic and completely insufferable to people gullible enough to believe the government’s fairy-tale story, saying “Prices are rising all around you, you morons! There ain’t no deflation in prices of food and housing and insurance and all the rest of that crap you have to worry about, all the time worry about, because you pay them all the time, and you know that their prices are going up! Prices are always going up! All because the evil Federal Reserve has created so much cash and credit so that you, businesses and governments can all easily get up to your freaking ears in debt and accrued obligations, creating new money the whole way. And now you will be destroyed -- destroyed, I tells ya! -- utterly, as in We’re Freaking Doomed (WFD), by prices that will increase exponentially, as they must, because (and you might want to write this down) that’s The Way Economics Freaking Works (TWEFW)!”
Whew! As for accrued obligations, that’s the big killer-diller. It’s like, ummm, how many times have you said “Sure, kids! Relax! I am saving for your hyper-expensive college educations, my darling children. Trust me!”, when you actually mean that you are dead broke, with a negative net worth, you spend every nickel you make, you are going further into debt just to live another day, and you secretly have your eye on a shiny new car.
“And why not?” you rationalize. “Theoretically, it’s possible that a miracle could happen! All the money we will need could just, you know, fall into our laps! Win a lottery! A long-lost relative dies and leaves us millions! Hahaha! Beautiful, beautiful money! Just in time to pay for college! And buy me a fancy new car! With a snazzy paint job! And a great stereo system and shiny mag wheels! Whee!”
Alas, I know that “one lousy chance in a million billion jillion” is pretty slim. But it’s all some of us have. And, happily, it COULD happen! One never knows!
On the other hand, I know a few things that WILL happen for sure, like how We’re Freaking Doomed (WFD) from the insane multiplication of the money supply to grow a national debt that is more than the entire GDP, a total debt that is more than 400% of GDP, a monstrous derivative colossus that dwarfs even THAT, a large, cancerous, devouring government with their legions of dependents, a monstrous overload of crappy consumer goods made of rotting plastic, and ludicrously overpriced, mal-invested assets comprising the overwhelming bulk of everybody’s net worth.
Scary stuff. You should know this.
In fact, science has proven (according to the geniuses at the Mogambo Institute Of Important Stuff (MIOIS)) that everybody actually DOES know this because it is encoded in everyone’s DNA.
It’s not too surprising, since DNA is now shown to control behavior, and thus acting stupidly is, from a Darwinian perspective, an evolutionary dead end. That is why it turns out that newborn babies cry! They are upset because they instantly and instinctively understand that ruinous inflation in prices is guaranteed after the insane inflation that they are seeing, for the first time, in the money supply! Weird, huh?
Anyway, sure enough, the article opens cheerily enough “The BLS put out their monthly CPI lie last week. They issued the proclamation that inflation is dead. Did you know your costs are 0.1% lower than they were one year ago? They then used these deflation numbers to proclaim your real wages soared last month.”
Then he went to the Bureau of Labor Statistics website (bls.gov/cpi/cpid1501.pdf) to find the actual numbers. They scared the hell out of me!
And here they are: Beef and veal +22.5%, Ground beef +21.0%, Steaks +14.9%, Pork +7.4%, Ham +11.5%, Whole Chicken +6.1%, Fresh Fish +3.5%, Eggs +8.2%, Cheese +7.8%, Fresh Vegetables +4.3%, Lettuce +12.2%, Tomatoes +9.6%, Coffee +6.7%, Butter +19.5%, Restaurant food +3.1%, Housing +2.9%, Hotels +7.6%, Owners Equivalent Rent +2.6%, Homeowners Insurance +5.6%, Electricity +2.5%, Water & Sewer +5.5%, Home Repairs +4.4%, Footwear +2.6%, Car Insurance +5.0%, Parking Fees & Tolls +2.3%, Medicinal Drugs +4.2%, Prescription Drugs +5.6%, Hospital Services +4.3%, Veterinarian Services +3.2%, Sporting Events +3.6%, Newspapers & Magazines +4.6%, College Tuition +3.6%, Educational Books & Supplies +6.5%, Grade School & High School Tuition +4.0%, Childcare & Nursery School +3.0%, Postage +3.6%, Cigarettes +2.5%, Financial Services +5.7%, and, to top it off, Tax Return Prep +9.3%.
He did note that gasoline was substantially down, which is a good thing, although “Furniture, appliances, computers and TVs are falling in price.” As was apparel. Big deal all.
The funny (as in the aforementioned We’re Freaking Doomed (WFD)) part was “And now for the BIGGEST LIE in the entire report,” which is that “health insurance only makes up 0.753% of your entire annual budget and it has FALLEN by 0.5% in the last year.”
So a guy making $50,000 a year pays only $376.50 a YEAR for health insurance? Hahaha! Government statistics! Hahaha!
So, now that we have had a good laugh at how inflation in prices is destroying us, how the government is lying to us about how badly we are being destroyed, and how the Federal Reserve continues destroying us by creating so much excess cash and credit, it is time to, sadly, move on.
I would be remiss in my duties as The Fabulous, Fabulous Mogambo (TFFM) if I did not, in closing, use all of the foregoing monetary horror story as a Very Good Reason (VGR) reason for you to buy gold and silver bullion right away.
And if the terrifying monetary insanity is, somehow, not enough to give you the screaming heebie-jeebies, then perhaps 2,500 years of history and the terrifying tales of fiat currencies will prove instructive, in that they all proved to be catastrophic disasters.
Flames everywhere. Riots. Starvation and suffering. Desperate people running willy-nilly, shouting “Woe betides us! It is a grave misfortune that the Austrian school of economics won’t be invented for hundreds or thousands of years! If we had only known of our folly, we would not have permitted the suicidal expansion of a fiat currency that has destroyed us! Mogambo would save us by shaming us into buying gold and silver, but he won’t be born for hundreds or thousands of years, either! Woe! Woe and double woe!”
So, judging by this little bit of history lesson, you are indeed living at a fortuitous nexus! Here and now, at this space and time, the Austrian school of economics has been invented (you can easily find it at Mises.org, and it’s free!), and The Fabulous, Fabulous Mogambo (TFFM) is also alive and well, offering congratulations to those who buy gold and silver (“Well done, Junior Mogambo Ranger (JMR)!”), and scorn on those who don’t (“You moron!”).
Some will, by taking advantage of the knowledge and encouragement, buy gold and silver, and they will one day, probably soon, be considered geniuses who saved their families, and made fortunes, who will be legends, immortals whose ancestors, for generations to come, will lovingly worship their memory and sing their praises.
Most will not, however, and will suffer mightily, I shall cruelly laugh at them.
Which to choose?Man! This investing stuff is easy! Whee!